Seek goodness everywhere, and when it is found, bring it out of its hiding place and let it be free and unashamed~ William Saroyan

“To begin to think with purpose is to enter the ranks of those strong ones who only recognize failure as one of the pathways to attainment.” — James Allen

The Clapping Song - Shirley Ellis

369 The Goose Drank Wine

I walk into my workplace to pick up something. I have my sunglasses on. My head throbs from the violence of virus I had picked up. I had been out of work for two days and traveled to work with a Styrofoam bait bucket in car ~just in case~ One of the employees sees me and smirks "Well, there she is Miss Hollywood" I was taken aback. I just kept walking. She walks into the vicinity of the task I needed to perform and stands directly in front of me, never once asking how I felt.
I recalled a few weeks earlier, my daughter had a spinal tap that ruptured, her spinal fluid leaked into her bloodstream and caused headaches so severe that she too wore glasses to work because of the migraine side effects. She saw a few people making fun of her out of these dark glasses. In all reality, she shouldn't have been at work. But didn't want to let the ~Team Down.~ It was her pain and the realization of how she must have felt that filled my eyes with water that morning. I remembered telling my daughters early in life. "When people react this way to you, it is because of their insecurities, don’t let them be yours as well. If you haven't done anything to injure or deserve their actions, don't accept the guilt for it. Move on. Kill them with kindness." I totally understand the blank stare the kids would give me now. It’s kind of like singing the Clap Clap song. 369 the goose drank wine the monkey chewed tobacco on the street car line..the line broke.etc… It makes you feel good to sing it, but it doesn’t mean a damn thing. And that’s ok.
Well, I ended up in the ER that same night, then surgery the next morning. I was out of work for 3 days. I go back to work. Again, total snobbery. One person wouldn't even acknowledge a hello. These two individuals were not affected in any way whatsoever with my absence from work and were not even in same department. But we had always talked cordially and had pleasant conversations. I tried to fight a pain that went deeper than where the surgeons knife had been. Amazingly, after all of these years I haven’t built up the first callous of resistance to that pain. Was it pain for myself, humanity? What exactly was I feeling? I just couldn't shake their lack of compassion and humanity. Is it so pervasive? It didn't discount the kindnesses bestowed upon me that week, but somehow I had let these two negative influences choke the crap out of them.
I ride the fence between the A & B as personality type's. But can easily claim the mantra "A glass half full, is full" I was angry at myself for having such a thin shell. Appearances may lead you to think I am a spiny, hard crustacean, but indeed if you poke me you will find a soft shell crab. I questioned God, lord help me he's going to zap me right out of this world one of these days. Once again, his goodness sand mercy reveal to me the compassion love and caring I had been shown for the past week. My hubby who was on vacation that week cared for me. He held wet cold towels to my lips and garbage cans and buckets to my head. I remember my hands being rubbed by kind nurses throughout the night before surgery. A doctor and friend worked me into an already crammed day of surgery and first on the list at that. The privacy curtains in pre-op opened to reveal another dear and kind friend who would be my scrub nurse and then another friendly acquaintance as my anesthesiologist. Did I mention Morphine? Faces of my family as anesthesia wears off. Hugs and love and gifts from old friends dropping in to see me and I was only in hospital 4 hours after surgery. Phone calls, e-mails and faxes and people that came through for me brought tears to my eyes. Customers when back at work that genuinely cared.
I can't say that it doesn't sting when I am in the presence of those that intentionally inflict pain. But, I will say that I feel more empathy for them now. This isn’t a public lash out on them, they don’t even know that I write. I really wasn't too excited about going back to work. I think my daughter sensed my apprehension as I dressed for work that morning. I get a text from her. "Kill them with kindness Mom" she said. I go out humming…3 6 9..the goose drank wine…Clap..Clap..Clap..Clap..
I got a card from the nursing staff at Roper St. Francis Hospital Mt. Pleasant. They all signed the card. I can hardly wait to go see them next week. I thought of each and every person who shows their kindness and compassion to others when I saw this quote.
~To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

Does This Moon Make My Butt Look Big? | Charlestongrit.com | Bold. Smart. Local. Now. | Charleston, SC

Does This Moon Make My Butt Look Big? | Charlestongrit.com | Bold. Smart. Local. Now. | Charleston, SC

Does This Moon Make My Butt Look Small? Renae Brabham

I sped over the Isle of Palms connector bridge to the island. I had vowed that even if the moon had risen and peeked over the buildings I wouldn't look until my toes hit the sand. I fed the meter it's dollar and headed down the wooden public access planks at a good clip. My gait ended in a snails pace as a man guided his mother up the small incline. It was an obvious role reversal, contrast of life. She had no doubt held his hands tightly as he took his first steps and crossed roads and now he returned the caring. She minced her steps and he held her arm firmly. I was glad that I was behind them and wouldn't have sped on for the world. I shared in her son's reward when I heard her exclaim as she saw the peregrine moon before I did. "Oh my!" she stopped mid stride. Her son watched her face smiling and then guided her to the side railing. I stepped over to share her view at the exact second that the moon inched into the horizon. And there it was, a thin red line stretching over the horizon. Growing by the second and changing hues from red to yellow. In minutes it was casting a beam of iridescent light over the waves. The extremely high tide had forced everyone to crowd onto the narrow strip of unscathed surf beach. This lent an air of event as we all stood crowded in the narrow swath between the waves washing in and the few feet of embankment. Scores of people still swam in the tide at dusk. The light of the moon called to their carefree spirit, thankfully without a hungry fish feeding. I walked backwards as I was leaving, not able to take my eyes off of the phenomenon. Two granddaughters’ did the same with me last year in March at the super moon. Driving back home over the bridge, I concluded that I am indeed dangerous in situations of extreme beauty. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to watch the sunset out of my front windshield or the moonrise out of the back and contemplated a u-turn at the bottom of the hill to do it all over again. Once home I plug in my camera to download the pics. I was shocked at the tiny white ball that replaced the yellow gargantuan moon hovering over the pier that I left. I can understand that I am light-years away and the image would not show without proper magnification lens. But shouldn't the picture at least portray what my eyes had seen? I began questioning my perception. Which I have been told I should do anyway for years. I scroll through other pics of items in horizon that I had taken recently, they were all in proportion to what I had viewed. So I did the old google search. According to Wikipedia "For over 100 years, research on the Moon Illusion has been conducted by vision scientists who invariably have been psychologists specializing in human perception. After reviewing the many different explanations in their 2002 book The Mystery of the Moon Illusion, Ross and Plug conclude "No single theory has emerged victorious. The Moon illusion is an optical illusion in which the Moon appears larger near the horizon than it does while higher up in the sky. This optical illusion also occurs with the sun and star constellations. It has been known since ancient times, and recorded by numerous different cultures. The explanation of this illusion is still debated." Hmmm...Maybe I need to open the receptors to the illusions of the spiritual world that I live in while here on earth. Those moments when the veil is lifted and I'm left to wonder at the unexplainable. We are not earthly beings living in a material world. We are spiritual beings living in a spiritual world. Eternity is a curtain away, maybe we can slide back the curtains more by allowing ourselves to believe that we don't see everything, we don't know everything and wonder is bliss. In doing so we could possibly unclog receptors that would allow us to participate in more of life's tantalizing experiences. What else am I perceiving to be factual in the universe that may be skewed by my perception. Did the man beside me see the same moon? What if what I see is only what my eyes tell my brain to comprehend? That leaves a whole lot to imagination! Maybe the colors of life would become such prisms of clarity that a rainbow only suggest it's many hues. Maybe I'm thinner than the mirror says. But I'm incredibly comforted by words and phrases like inconclusive, debatable, undetermined. I don't want to know the answers to every little thing about this universe. I will happily transcend from here to there in my chimera's.

Get off of your Jack Arse

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” — Mark Twain